The Freakin' Chickens Are Here!

How far would you go to keep up with the current trend?

She shot straight up in bed as her husband burst in the room exclaiming, "The freakin chickens are here!"
The What??? Now, if my husband were to say that to me I would be stumped. Did we order frozen chicken breasts from some company similiar to Omaha steaks or something? Did he make a surprise trip to Sams Club and bring home a box of chicken nuggets for the kids and can't find room in our overstuffed freezer? Is chicken code for friends who are afraid to enter our house for some unknown reason?
No. For my dear friend, her husband was being very literal. Ten baby chickens were delivered to their doorstep and though they were expecting them to arrive within the next few weeks they were just not exactly prepared for them to show up yesterday. The chicken coop is not complete. That's okay. The little chicks need to stay inside getting to know the family for the next month anyway. They will become like pets.
My friend does not live on a farm, or even in the country for that matter. Neither do several of my other friends who own chickens and collect their own eggs. We are talking about residential neighborhoods and downtown living. One friend even had a scenario where a few chickens escaped her yard and were running down the sidewalk of a main street in our downtown. Don't worry! She chased them down!
I would not know where to even begin with raising chickens. Have you ever heard of debarking a dog? I think I would have to have the chickens "debocked".
So, in L.A. the hippest people carry little purse dogs everywhere they go. Here, my friends proudly sport chickens. They don't carry them in purses, although that might be a fun trend to get started!
I know! I will borrow one of my friend's little chicks and take it with me on my trip to L.A. I 'll have a little chicken sweater monogrammed for it to wear, and I will carry it around in my purse with its little head poking out proudly informing people it's the "latest trend". Soon you will see on the cover of US Weekly "The Latest Hollywood Accessory! The monogrammed Chicken! See which celebrities are sporting this new look." If you happen to notice it laid an egg in your purse that is an added bonus! Mmmmm....breakfast!

Homeschool Gymnastics

Have you ever tried to teach nursing manners?

My 11 month old baby girl is the CLASSIC gymnast nurser I read about when I first started nursing Will. "Some babies will even try to perform a summersault without missing a suck" states Dr. Sears in The Baby Book. Ummmm.....yeah. I would say that is just about right. In fact, I am pretty sure Natalie has performed the feat.

Yes, she is a multi-tasker at a young age. She gets her workouts in while eating, and I pay the price. She literally stands on her head, kicks her leg over her head, twists her body around 180 degrees and changes legs all without stopping sucking. You would think this would hurt! I am a little frightened by the fact that it doesn't. I mean, what does this say about my body and the potential that it will ever go back to normal? I think we all know the answer to THAT question!

My mother saw Natalie performing these antics at Christmas and said, "Oh, I don't KNOW, honey! It was right about the time your sister started doing that I had to wean. I could not take it!" Now, I have to laugh that she was speaking of my little sister Amy because this is not the only way Natalie has been compared to Amy. I even constantly call Natalie "Amy" because she reminds me so much of Amy when she was little.

INot only does Natalie frequently perform Olympic Gold Medal worthy gymnastics while feeding, she also has very strongly stated a preference to one side. I could be comforted by the fact that only the right side of my body is being demolished. Instead, I am frequently complaining to anyone willing to listen about how lopsided I currently am. Really. It is not a pretty picture and I am about to go invest in one of those fake inserts to balance myself out.

In spite of it all, I am not planning to wean anytime soon! I really do love nursing my baby and she won't be a baby too much longer. It does make me wonder though, how exactly do you teach nursing manners? She is not a good pupil on this subject!

Take a Little Time for Yourself

Have you ever misunderstood your own mood?

As part of my rigorous, 28-day California preparation, I booked a facial at Serenity Day Spa hoping for a transformation of my blotchy, breaking-out skin. Plus, I had a gift certificate I needed to use. My facial was scheduled for this afternoon, and after a hurried day of going to the gym, running errands and taking Will to an afternoon birthday party, I finally left the children with daddy, so I could enjoy this much needed time for myself.
Now, I know what you are thinking! Oh, that sounds so wonderful! I would be in heaven! Yeah, that is what I was thinking too when I booked the appointment. So, why was I dreading the appointment all day? Yes, I just said DREADING. When I said goodbye to my children I felt anxiety about leaving them for the hour and a half I would be gone. I must be going cuckoo! As I stood there in the spa facial room and prepared to lie down, I realized I did not feel like being there at all. Why on earth?
Then I was hit with a revelation about what was wrong with me. I am constantly being touched all day long by someone, whether it be one of my children or my husband. I am tugged on, pulled at, bitten, kissed, hugged, loved on, and I enjoy every minute. My love tank is full. In fact, I am pretty sure it is overflowing. When I was single I really was not touched by anyone unless I was dating. I remember loving things like facials, manicures, pedicures, and massages partly because it provided human touch. Today, I did not think I needed or wanted ANYONE ELSE TOUCHING ME!!! That sounds ridiculous for someone as touchy-feely as me, but it was truly how I was feeling.
Guess what? I was WRONG. That appointment ended up being the most soothing thing for my psyche that I could have ever imagined. It was so stinkin relaxing, and I ended up feeling like I had died and gone to heaven. I felt all this tension melting away, and I started thinking of all these really nice things I should do for my husband. I thought, "Instead of henpecking my husband tonight, I should give him a facial! I bet that would make his year!" Yes, the facial was rejuvinating me alright! Since when have I had enough energy to even think of giving my husband anything above and beyond the ordinary? Middway through the appointment I thought, "Why on earth would I dread anything this wonderful? What was I thinking? I should have been so excited about this all week! I need one of these every day!" Nevermind the fact that my skin did feel so much better too!
The moral of the story is sometimes we don't really know what we need. I had no idea how tightly wound I have been lately until I started to feel myself unwind in that quiet, dim room. Sometimes as a mom it is hard for me to take time for myself because I am so attached to my children, but I guess I do NEED some mommy time. Oh, and my husband is happy now too, because YES, I JUST GAVE HIM A FACIAL.

Lack of Sleep

What makes people "know" they have had enough children?

Do you just feel it in your bones?
One of my friends said, "I knew when I held another baby and felt nothing. That maternal longing did not kick in."
Tom and I often talk about how convenient it would be to be done, but neither of us has that feeling like "this is it". We have always wanted at least 3 children!

I do have my moments of doubt though. Like the past 3 nights when Natalie does not want to sleep AT ALL unless she is in bed with us. And then Will decides to join the party at 4 a.m. because he wakes up out of a dead sleep instinctively knowing he is missing out on something. Jealousy takes over and he is pulling and wacking Natalie until I leave the room with her. In utter delirium I am stumbling around the house with her trying to decide if I rock her again for the 100th time only to lie her down and have her startle into a screaming fit. Or, do I take her to Will's room and sleep with her in there while he has comfortably taken over my luscious bed. Or, do I put Natalie in her bed and let her scream and then take Will back to his bed and let him scream while I drug myself and Tom?

Seriously people, there are moments when I really don't have enough arms, and I wonder how moms of twins do it. Adding one more to the picture sounds a bit insane to me. I realized today that I have not consistently slept through the night for over 3 years. I have had the occasional treat when a fluke happens and both of my children do not awaken. I have forgotten what REALLY being rested feels like!

My husband seriously struggles with insomnia, and I know I should feel tremendous compassion for him after he has a sleepless night. I guess in my own stupor I am usually pretty insensitive about it. "Oh, sorry honey. Natalie was up 3 times last night too!" Poor guy!

A Little Decoration Never Hurt Anyone!

Do you ever wonder why Katie and Tom let Suri Cruise's bangs hang in her eyes?

I, for one, would just love to get a hold of her hair. Her wardrobe may be perfect and cost $1000 per item, but how about a little decor for her head?
One way the south definately differs from the two other places I have lived (Michigan and California) is the love of the Hair Bow! As southern tradition would have it, a little girl's head needs to be properly decorated and for some babies it starts particularly young. I personally fell in love with the hair bow concept when our nurses in postpartum were obsessed with making little bows and gluing them to Natalie's head. One nurse seriously made me 12 different hair bows in different colors and sent me home with lubricating jelly to apply them to her head. Yes, we started extremely young.


The craze continued from there when we received this headband bow as a gift from one of our friends. I literally wanted her to wear it EVERY day! To me, she looked like a little present that had been dropped on our doorstep. Or maybe she looked like a wedding cake, so perfectly decorated. I had to have more! It worked particularly well with her monogrammed clothing and bibs!


There was no end to the possibilities with her wardrobe. Soon, I was ordering all different colors of bows and headbands from this Etsy dealer. Here I am a yankee, creating my own little Georgia Peach.
She was a trooper and never fussed about her bows. As my brother-in-law said at Christmas, "I don't think I have seen that baby without a bow on her head since the first time I met her!" I am not sure he was complimenting us, but more seemed a little puzzled about WHY we would do this to our baby.



My mother never said anything. She would just promptly REMOVE the headband bow when she was holding Natalie and then tell me that Natalie seemed a little "uncomfortable" with it. That was fine with me. Not to be swayed, I just put it right back on!
There was the occasional carride where I would look in the review mirror into her little carseat mirror only to realize she had pulled the headband over her eyes and the bow was protruding from her FACE instead of her head! I do admit, I did feel a little bad about that. I mean, what had she been doing back there? I could just picture her pulling the band really far out and then snapping the bow to her face. Sometimes, I proactively removed the bow for carrides.

We have now graduated to clipping her bangs with the bows we have removed from the headbands. She is fascinated with her bows. She pulls them out, chews on them, and then tries to put them back in her hair. She hasn't quite mastered the clip though. We will get there soon, I am sure!
I admit, have wondered if I would look as cute in a hair bow as my daughter does? I mean, with her, it seems to cover any multitude of wardrobe flaws. Would it do the same for me? Then I watched American Idol last night and one of the contestents who has had obvious wardrobe issues told Simon that she was the girl who had terrible issues with style and did things like wore hairbows and leggings. I guess that answers that!

It should definately be reserved for our little girls, but here's to this southern treasure I am so thankful to have been introduced to. The delightful hair bow!

Workout Update

Have you ever felt THIS good?

Workouts have become so intoxicating lately that after I am done I am euphoric and convinced that if I look in the mirror partially naked, surely I will look like a supermodel on the front of Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Edition! I guess the endorphins really do a good job at lifting my spirits and making me delusional. Maybe I should do a swimsuit photoshoot for a reality check.

I worked out this morning, took a shower, and felt on top of the world. I decided to wear a black sweater today that is still a little too small for me (for it is a Size Small!). I tried it on, recognized that it was hestitatingly covering my midriff, and decided to go for it anyway because I was so excited that I could actually squeeze into it. This is a sweater that I have not worn since before I became pregnant with Will, my first child. It felt like a major accomplishment even though it would definately look better on me when the love handles are actually gone, not just diminished. Oh well! I wore it proudly and just hoped that it wasn't TOO obvious that I was slightly poured into it. Plus, it was really, really cold here today and a turtleneck sweater just sounded appealing (minus the wind around my belly when the sweater crept up).

I forgot to mention that I did lose my 2 pounds last week and am on to week number 2 of my 28 day challenge! Next weigh in will be Thursday. Cross your fingers for me.

A girl or a boy?

Do you believe in JINXes?

Okay, I've never been supersticious. Or so I have always proclaimed. I mean, as a Christian I have always had faith and don't get worked up about things TOO much. But you know those old sayings like, "bread always falls with the buttered side down"? Where did they come from? Personal experience tells me that whenever things can go wrong, they often do. Like when I told a story on Friday about my sister's embarressing step aerobics class experience only to be tripping all over myself the next morning at my step class. My step literally almost flew threw the air at one point because I could not get it together right.
I have been thinking, can we really impact what happens in our lives by having the wrong conversation or asking the wrong questions? Both times I was pregnant people ALWAYS worked one little innocent question into any discussion we had about the baby. The questioner would lean in and quietly ask the secret question...
"So what do you want, a boy or a girl?"
"Ummmm.....either one is fine! As long as they are healthy!" (Of course you have to throw the as long as they are healthy in. What parent would pick having an unhealthy baby over having the sex they secretly desired.)
"You don't have any preference?"
"I don't know....I mean there are advantages both ways," hesitating because if I even let myself go there then there are consequences.
a. if you say you want a boy and then you have a girl, for sure your girl will find out at some point in her little life that her parents REALLY WANTED A BOY and she will be in therapy the rest of her life!
b. If you say you really want a girl, you will have JINXED yourself and you will for sure have a boy.
So, anyone who has been pregnant knows in her heart that these are two very real implications of this question. But NOONE can resist asking. Including myself! I actually asked two different pregnant people this very question within the last two weeks. I thought to myself, "WHY are you doing this to them?" The question is irresistable. You think you are going to find out a really cool secret and then you can root for them to have sex a or b. Like we have a say in the matter. Like it hasn't ALREADY been determined! The pregnant woman is trapped by the question because there is really no right answer except the one including "as long as the baby is healthy". But somehow, in that situation, wrong or right, I find myself believing in jinxes without even knowing it.
So to any pregnant woman out there who has been asked that question and answered wrong, don't worry, we won't tell your child and we will still root for you to have your way!